A young lady who is dreaming to get married to a Defence Officer will be excited about the various adventures that await.
Heart brimming with nervous anticipation of the dinner parties, ballroom dance events and other exciting stuff that made is for the “royal life” of Army officers and their wives. But being a defence wife is not just about having fun and enjoying the royal life. Soon one will start realising that life in the Army is no ball-room dancing. It is very demanding and comes with its pleasures as well as pains.
You need to be presentable all the time as you have now landed among the best-dressed and finest ladies one can ever find.
Your humility is put to test when you have to put on a cheerful face at the party, even if you are frowning inside. There is no room for impatience or arrogance here. So yes, it teaches you a lot about Humility.
You would now be living Out of the box. Postings every after 2-3 years. All that travelling without getting rest postpartum, cleaning up the ‘quarter’.A baby in your hand but no help from a busy husband, and no other help around would be nerve-racking. It will test both your physical and mental strength. But eventually, you will learn to cope with them all.
You may have to depend on your husband for pocket money, as being a defence wife you might as well have to leave your demanding job as there are so many things to be taken care of back home. But at least you get to remain engaged for the day. You will get to meet many highly qualified women who have left good jobs for the sake of being there for the husband and children.
There will be times when your husband is in field tenure, foreign posting or on exercise. You need to play the role of both father and mother to your children. You have to manage everything on your own. You can’t even share your problems with your husband as somewhere you feel he shouldn’t be bogged down by your worries. He needs peace of mind to do his duties well, amid difficulties and danger. You know he is a soldier first and a husband only next. Then there is always the fear looming at the back of your mind over your husband’s safety. There is the inevitable long wait for his safe return, which is a test of patience and endurance.
A person’s life is entirely changed. And you get to learn many things on this journey. No permanent home for you till your husband retires. And someone aptly said, Behind every strong soldier, there is an even stronger braveheart — who is the Army wife.