Though marriage is often considered to be the “happily ever after” phase of relationships, it won’t be acceptable to believe that married couples don’t face their fair share of issues and challenges. After all, Life is not a bed of roses.
There are several proven reasons why most marriages fail, and those usually include jumping into marriage for the wrong reasons, loss of individual identity, overbearing parental duties, not having the same vision of success anymore, unmet expectations, lack of intimacy, differences in finances, different hobbies and too many disputes.
Since the success rate of most marriages depends largely on how couples deal with issues as they arise, if you want to protect your own marriage from the possibility it getting shattered, it’s helpful to have a heads up on the most common issues that come with the territory known as married life.
Lack of Communication
Talking is about giving information without the need for a response, and it leaves plenty of room for complains and criticisms. Communication, however, is a verbal and nonverbal exchange of information that requires a response. Because it takes more than one person to communicate, it’s focused on a connection between people where it’s safe to openly share ideas and information free of judgment.
When spouses fail to practice proper communication, it’s easy for them to fall into a habitual way of ineffectively speaking to one another. What’s worse is that if poor communication skills are not dealt with, it’s possible for more serious problems to arise.
Infidelity
As unfortunate as it may be, once couples get married, it’s not uncommon for them to become emotionally disconnected from one another. When this happens, it’s likely that at least one spouse’s needs will become unmet, and so they may start looking elsewhere to feel fulfilled.
This is where emotional “infidelity” has the opportunity to slide into the marriage.
Some people feel that emotional infidelity is worse than physical cheating; it’s about connecting with another person on an intimate level.
In order to prevent infidelity of any kind, couples must be clear on what they both consider cheating to be. Initially, partners may not have the same feelings towards what does and doesn’t count as cheating, but getting on the same page will lessen the chances of them allowing it to happen.
It’s also important that spouses remain supportive of one another’s emotional needs.
Financial issues
When couples get married, it’s common for their bank accounts to follow suit. While this may not always be the case, even married couples that decide to keep their finances separate still face issues when it comes to money.
Discussing finances with your spouse can be stressful and tense, especially if the couple has different spending habits. In these types of edgy situations, it’s common for the conversation to become less about money and more about personal values and habits.
For eg., when one spouse is stressed about the money they may be less patient and more irritated in general and both put a strain on each other. They may even pick fights with their partner about unrelated things without realizing it.
Selfish Behavior
If one spouse acts selfishly and consistently places their own needs and desires ahead of their spouse’s, then it’ll only be a matter of time until the neglected spouse feels unworthy and unloved.
When couples get married, they’re promising to love one another for better or worse, and part of that promise means not acting selfishly. While this may sound easy enough, the green-eyed monster comes in many sneaky shapes and forms.
At its worse, selfishness is controlling, manipulative, jealous, possessive, and abusive. In milder forms, it can be seen in a lack of consideration and respect.
Lack of Trust and Honesty
Trust is the very basis of love, and without it a healthy marriage cannot exist. When a spouse cheats, lies, or breaks a promise, it can really hurt the relationship.
Restoring trust in a marriage where someone has been betrayed is no easy task. If you want to fix your marital problems then both spouses must be committed to fixing the relationship in order to have any success in moving past the issue.
If the issues are not dealt with, the betrayed spouse will continue to feel hurt, anger, and suspicious which will ultimately spoil your relationship completely.
Loosing Temper
While it’s normal for married couples to get into small fights and disputes with each other sometimes, it’s important that both spouses act in the most appropriate manner when these types of situations arise.
Instead of reacting explosively with outbursts or fits of rage, couples need to address the issue at hand, keep calm, and consider one another’s feelings. It’s also important that couples listen, openly express their opinions, and avoid defensive behaviors.
Trying to Change your Partner
This common relationship problem occurs when couples overstep their partner’s personal boundaries to mold their beliefs.
It does happen that such disregard for your partner’s boundaries might happen by mistake; the extent of retaliation from the spouse that is being attacked is usually appeased in time.
