With time there has been several changes experienced in a relationship shared by two people(couple). There is no doubt that the modern times are equipped with modern problems. The world of dating relationships is riddled with challenges which were never experienced in the olden times.
A romantic relationship, especially the modern ones take a lot of effort, sacrifices, compromises, and understanding to make it a happy and fulfilling one. If you are in a relationship that you don’t want to ever fall apart, here are the 10 best pieces of advice that might help you.
Don’t rush or feel pressured
There may be people who love you that would like to see you find a relationship quickly, but don’t feel pressured to comply. Choosing the person with whom you spend your life should be a selective process. So take your time and be discerning. Relationships are built over time and should never be rushed into, neither because your parents push nor because you feel the senior scramble pressure before graduation or some other milestone. Drop the rush.
Be yourself
At first, we’re all on our best behavior to make a good impression. But be yourself. If you find you are adjusting yourself in order to fit someone else’s expectations, be cautious. Our friends should make us better people, but don’t try to be someone you’re not, because it’s not true and it’s not sustainable.
Also, seek romantic relationships with those that share your faith, and avoid relationships with those that don’t. Our culture says religion is about trivial preferences, but true faith is the foundation of how we order our lives. You can’t build a life on a mismatched foundation.
Face insecurities
We’re all damaged with insecurities, and trying to grow closer touches on our vulnerabilities. Your partner is broken too, and you will step on each other’s toes. Expect a little conflict, and decide to treat relationship missteps as opportunities to learn and grow together. Fighting well is a sign of a good relationship. Insulting and assassinating each other’s character is not. And physical hitting or intimidation is a deal breaker.
Be picky
Don’t hold out for someone who is perfect, because no one is perfect. But be choosy for someone who honors God, his elders and you. Don’t settle for anything less. A person of questionable moral character is not someone with whom you want to build a life. Befriend them, witness to them, but don’t date them–it will only lead to heartache.
Keep a sense of humor
Every relationship will have awkward moments. Decide not to get bent out of shape over the screw-ups. There is nothing productive to be gained from kicking yourself over past mistakes. It is a blessing to learn to laugh at your own mistakes. Decide to take life as a fun adventure and acquire some interesting stories and laughs along the way. If you will be able to laugh about it down the road, then why not start by laughing now.
Jealousy is totally unnecessary.
Young adults are often fickle-minded, and they have the tendency to look at other people even when they are in a relationship.
When you find out your partner has a crush on someone else, just let them be. There’s no need for you to get jealous because they’re just admiring some traits of that person and that’s that. At the end of the day, when asked who they love, the answer would still be you.
Build connections
Intimacy has basically four facets: intellectual, emotional, spiritual, and physical. Your relationship should grow in all those connections in proportion as you mature together. You need deepening connections in all these areas, not just one. Cultivate them intentionally. Talk about them and make plans explicitly on how you can grow together appropriately if needed. Danger or trouble in one area is a red flag for them all.
Don’t make a big deal out of small things.
Oftentimes, relationships become lifeless due to petty things, such as forgetting important dates, arriving late, sudden change of plans at the last minute, etc. Sure, these can be frustrating and annoying, but you don’t have to make a big deal out of it.
There’s no need to nag or argue, but perhaps it would be better if you two talk it out calmly and reach a compromise. This way, you not only hear each other’s opinions but also share a decision that you two are comfortable with.
Be thoughtful in the simplest ways.
It always pays to be thoughtful. You need not always be sweet and cuddly, but you can be thoughtful when it comes to reminding each other about important events, or telling your partner that he/she should not go hungry during a busy day. Writing love letters and sneaking a chocolate bar in each other’s pockets are good ways to show thoughtfulness – without the unnecessary cheesiness.
Be patient.
Allowing your partner to work on his or her aspirations is one of the best ways to show your love and support, as you show that you are with him or her all the way. It is also a test of patience because the distance and time away from each other can change the both of you, and it’s up to you how to keep holding on.