When the lock-downs began last year, there was widespread speculation that many marriages will fail and the divorce rate would spike. Traditional marriage vows uttered during the bliss of a wedding day suddenly took on a gravity that may not have been fully apparent before. Indeed, for many couples, the pandemic made it evident that continuing their relationship was untenable and tough. But for many husbands and wives, the greatest reset of the pandemic was that it actually drew them closer. They became more grateful for each other and the love grew stronger.
Sharing with you some ways to have a healthy and loving relationship during this pandemic.
Make time to be apart
Yes, you read it right, Covid-19 brings a jumble of contradictions. Give each other the space you need as introverts or extroverts. If you and your spouse are together 24/7 working from home, this is extra important. You both need time to yourselves — to work out, take a walk, get in the garden, or read a book. Otherwise one or both of you will implode by week’s end.
Laugh as much as you can
Funny reality shows? GIF/Stickers text wars? Your favorite movie from high school? Whatever makes you and your partner laugh, do that. Dark humor that only the two of you find funny can be a saving grace when the world seems bleak. Private jokes step in when words fail, and laughter might be the best medicine we have — until you are vaccinated.
Covid might not be the worst thing you’ll go through together. But for most of us, this year has been rough — and it’s not over yet.
Yet the words of your marriage vows can still ring true. We promised to love each other “for worse… for poorer… in sickness… till death do us part.” Until the happy halves roll around again (better, richer, healthier) here’s to sticking together and hoping for better days ahead.
Connect with others
You can’t rely on your better half to fill all your needs. So take inventory of how you can draw support from friends or family to handle your stress or anxiety. You can video call a friend or call your mom on a walk. Get together with friends for a socially distanced visit? Marriage is strengthened by the people who hold us up.
Take out time to be together
Find a few moments each day to reconnect, even if it’s date nights on the front step or coffee breaks between video calls. Especially if one or both of you are essential workers dealing with heightened workplace stress, checking in during the whirl of your weekdays can make a big difference.
Cope how you can
Try coping and dealing with your differences. While in quarantine: he can cope with the craziness by digging in his garden and building furniture in the garage; and you may turn to texting friends or posting on social media. When you give each other the freedom you need to cope, your marriage stays healthier.